I won’t be coming back to school next year. I don’t want to repeat Year 11 at my old school and my parents won’t let me go to the local high school which is just down the road.
I want a red MG with spoked wheels which I saw the other day. There’s a local boy who has a similar one and once he gave me a ride as his girlfriend didn’t want to.
I know I won’t earn much with only Year 10 but I’ve had enough of school and I would have more money and time for dances.
I don’t think I’m a lesbian as I like going to dances with my school friends. Only one of us has a boyfriend whom she’d met at work. She’s a typist but I can’t type so that job is out.
I’d like to be a bricklayer or a labourer but my Mum said ‘no’. She also said ‘no’ to my having a motorbike but that would be all I could afford at the beginning.
I’m feeling rather depressed and I don’t know if I want to do the Generation Waking Up training. I might get a job.
And what am I going to do with my part-time job? It would help me save more quickly. And Mum said I could do English again next year at a high school where a local teaches. We’ll see.
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I went to see my counsellor today to talk about Gen-Up. She said there’s no reason I still can’t do the training and help out at schools with symposiums.
She agreed that I seemed depressed and gave me an inventory to complete to see how depressed I am. I showed a rather high state which may have to do with leaving school, the same school for 12 years. There are many memories and friendships made but I have fulfilled my fear of not making it to Year 12.
I am disappointed in myself. The same thing happened with the Girl Guides where I received my First Class badge but not the Queen’s Guide.
My counsellor said we could talk some more at the Gen-Up if I was still feeling depressed. There would be lots to do and young people to relate to, she said, and I might find my purpose in life. At the moment it’s pretty much of nothing though I shouldn’t discount the friends I do have. They like going to dances too and I found out that there are more than myself who won’t be going back next year. So I would have been without my support network of school friends if I’d gone back so all in all it’s good and we can hang out more as we won’t have homework to do – except a bit of English. This could be awesome. Now all I need is a place of my own and then I would be set. I wonder if they have the same idea.
Should I leave school or not? Should I find a place of my own with my friends?